There are two things in this world that anger me: parking meters without the "first ten minutes free" button, and Hazel Crosby

Although Kurt Vonnegut's 1963 novel Cat's Cradle boasts a variety of amiable and quirky characters, each with their own distinguishing characteristics, which usually seem to take shape in the form of flaws, one character makes me want to vacate planet earth altogether. She goes by the name Hazel Crosby, the wife of the pompous and pudgy businessman H. Lowe Crosby whom seeks a new force of sweatshop laborers in San Lorenzo. Although the motives of her husband might make him seem like the one to detest, I could not help but cringe at every word of his wife. Hazel embodies every stereotype of a ditsy, obnoxious american imaginable. For example, when ranting about her and the speaker Jonas' status as "Hoosiers" she urges "You call me mom" (65). This comes off in an extremely creepy way due to her oddly commanding tone for something that would otherwise be seemingly cute for an older lady to say. However her overly-friendly mannerism combined with her direct characterization as "heavy" and with a "twangy accent" paints a horrific image of everything I am ashamed of in America (63). More specifically, that image presents itself in the form of an overweight, rosy cheeked middle-aged woman with curlers scattered around her thinning blond hair. However innocent this may seem by itself, when combined with being a total ignoramus Hazel becomes the epitome of an arrogant American as seen in the eyes of the world over. Furthermore, my seething frusturation with Hazel arises when after exiting the plane and seeing the locals she quips, "good thing its a christian island" or else she would "be a little scared" (98). Because being christian automatically fornicates the goodness in people, sarcasm intended, Miss Crosby narrow-mindedness shines through her plump physique once more. Thus, prompting me to feel a tinge of embarrassment for being associated with people such as her, however fictional her character may be. The picture perfect religion spewing, oafish american as seen in Miss Crosby manages to set off every one of my pet peeves in one fell swoop creating a foil to other more likable characters in the novel such as the always cleverly cynical speaker, Jonah. l;